A man was walking down the street when he saw a woman with the perfect, and I mean PERFECT, breasts he'd ever seen.
He walked up to her and said, "Ma'am, you have perfect breasts, and I will pay you $100 to bite them." The woman was horrified and began to walk away.
The man caught her and said, "Alright, I'll pay you $1,000 to bite your breasts." Still horrified, the woman began to run away.
The man caught her again and said, "Fine. I'll pay you $10,000 to bite your breasts, and not a penny more." The woman then thinks that $10,000 will be worth it, so she finally agreed.
They went into a deserted alley away from the city action. The woman took off her shirt and bra, revealing the perfect breasts. The man then began to touch, squeeze, fondle, poke, and everything to the woman's breasts EXCEPT biting them.
The woman then said, "Well, are you gonna bite them or not?!"
If I today write "F9 56 02 11 9D 41 E3 C0 09 5B D8 56 C5 74 63 88" Can I then sue everyone who tries to use that as an algorithm, or does it have to be done in the opposite order?
There is a beautiful deserted island in the middle of nowhere where the following people are stranded:
2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman
2 French men and 1 French woman
2 German men and 1 German woman
2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman
2 English men and 1 English woman
2 Bulgarian men and 1 Bulgarian woman
2 Swedish men and 1 Swedish woman
2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman
One month later on this beautiful deserted island in the middle of nowhere ...
The 1 Italian man killed the other for the Italian woman
The 2 French men and the French woman are living happily together in a "menage a trois"
The 2 German men have a strict weekly schedule of when they alternate with the German woman
The 2 Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman is cleaning and cooking for them
The 2 English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman
The Bulgarian men took one look at the endless ocean, one look at the woman and started swimming.
The two Swedish men are contemplating the virtues of suicide while the woman keeps on bitching about her body being her own and the true nature of feminism. But at least it's not snowing and the taxes are low.
The Irish began by dividing their island Northside-Southside and setting up a distillery. They don't remember if sex is in the picture, cause it gets sort of foggy after the first few litres of coconut-whiskey, but at least they know the English aren't getting any...
A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says,
"We have a drink here named after you."
The grasshopper says, "Bob?"
A sandwich walks into a bar.
The barman says, "Sorry we don't serve food in here."
A jumper cable walks into a bar.
The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."
Two peanuts walk into a bar.
One was a-salted.
A pig goes into a bar and orders ten drinks. He finishes them up and the bartender says, "Don't you need to know where the bathroom is?" The pig says, "No, I go wee wee all the way home."
A dyslexic man walks into a bra...
A Priest, Rabi, anda Minister walk into a bar.
Bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"
"I've been making a lot of Freudian slips lately," a man says casually to his friend.
"Like what?" asks his buddy.
"Well, last week I asked the train conductor for two pickets to Tittsburgh."
"I did something similar the other day," says the friend.
"My wife and I were having breakfast, and instead of saying, 'Honey, please pass the butter,' I said, 'You bitch, you ruined my life!'"
